An Excerpt

"...I became fed up.  Tired of waking up to depression, feeling foggy-minded all the time, knowing that my life wasn't the way it was supposed to be.  So I started to force myself to read the Bible first thing after waking up.  I forced myself to pray because I needed to.  And I force myself to look to Jesus in all situations.

"I know 'force' sounds like I'm unwilling to do those things, and I suppose I was to some extent.  But it is mostly referring to the fact that I didn't FEEL like doing those things.  And I didn't.  And I still don't, at times.  But I know that it is not about how you feel and that feelings are the last things you want to follow or rely upon for accuracy.  To force yourself to do something will turn it into a habit, and then emotions will follow later on.

"David in Psalms commanded his soul to rejoice.  This is the same concept.  I am commanding my mind and spirit to be disciplined, and as I continue to do these things, they will follow suit, and it won't even be a matter of conscious choice anymore.  I'm not at that point yet, but I am getting there.  And Jesus is remaining faithful every step of this journey..."

15 September 2013; 1656